When I married Eric, I had no idea how blessed my life was about to become. I knew I'd found a catch, he was super. But what I'm about to say may surprise some of the readers out there. I became related to one of my soon to be best friends- my mother-in-law. God knew I needed a special friend, in my husband's mother.
She has been a friend to me in so many ways, and is so dilligent with our children. Deliberate in her actions and able to navigate what might be rough waters for some, she sees the joy in a day and finds a way to 'make it work.'
We were very sick this last week, the week she'd planned to visit. She came anyway, and was, as usual, priceless in her assistance in a never ending mission to do the laundry, or whatever needed to be done. She hustled Jack in to the car and off they went, when Henry needed a break from big brother. And as always, was ready to watch the kids so we could have an evening out.
Some time ago, I wrote about her and one of our early experiences.
Millie, our mix breed, is getting up in years. She's our first and only dog so far in our marriage. Once again, at my mother-in-laws suggestion, I have considered getting a new puppy to be trained by the older. She normally knows what she's talking about, so I'll have to give it some consideration. Nana reminded me of how we got Millie while she was here. So if you will indulge me the personal essay, I'll post a salute I wrote to Millie, the Dog who Raised our Family, in honor of Nana & her dog, Bertie's, recent visit. Come back soon Nana. (realized it isn't so brief, so skip down to blog on Proverbs, if it doesn't peak your interests. I'll be back to 'treasure and trouble' next blog)
Millie, the Dog who Raised Our FamilyThroughout the early years of our marriage, one of the most enjoyable experiences we had was going to the fair. Simple small town enjoyment that only greasy corn dogs and icy coca-cola’s can provide. I’ve always been fond of fair-food. I had been accused of being a specialist in the art of fair-food when we married. I knew exactly where you could get fair-style fries, and the best year round corn dog anywhere in the city. Even salted pretzels with mustard must be located with care. No micro-waved pretzels must be allowed into the repertoire of fair-food. Anyhow, how we came to enjoy the fair was solely due to my mother-in-law’s connections. There are many perks to a government job. They may seem small and odd to the Wall Street style lawyer, but to your local small- town style girl, they were a delicacy.
My friend & mother-in-law informed us when the fair would be and how many tickets did we want? Can you imagine my delight? Anyone who has naively gone to the fair at peak hours knows you can spend a life savings just on admission. To have any sort of a discount is mandatory. The tickets are just as expensive as a ‘Les Mis'. Yet could it be? along with a magnificent husband, I had been blessed with a man who had connections into the fair-- at a discount? County workers family day was the prize as far as I was concerned. As the years passed we took all of our nieces & nephews to the fair in varying combinations, as tickets were made available and made numerous memories made, even taking our new born babes just as my mother-in-law retired. That was a year to remember. Almost a rite of passage, from one era into the next.
I have to tell you, we were ‘older’ when we married. Many we knew began to doubt if we’d find our soul-mates. We had ourselves begun to doubt, yet God provided, in so many ways, that which our souls had longed. I was the beneficiary of a one of a kind. – I was in many ways the envy of my many girlfriends who had married in a timely fashion, acquiring in-laws we were all too immature to appreciate. I still get stares when I mention my mother-in-law and actually have something nice to say. But it would be ridiculous to call her anything but an integral friend and part of my life I can’t ever imagine having lived without. She so often would mention (note there are no italics on the word mention) particular bits of information to us that would alter our life in some way or sort. She would think to herself and outloud say the name of an apartment complex that was safer than most, and tell the location. Perhaps this might work for our first home. The most practical things that might go unnoticed by someone else or be perceived as twisted manipulation, were often a part of our conversations, and thus change our worlds forever.
One such conversation included the perk of a lifetime. Little known to the outsider, in our county government, county employees receive a discount when you choose to adopt from the county animal shelter. We had looked at many animals, but both knew we’d bring our pet home from the shelter. After all, this was practical, and neither of us felt compelled to have a dog that had a pedigree. We knew that the dogs with the best disposition were obtained with no papers, except those that indicated how many were in the litter, when it was dropped off and what the vet techs supposed was the breed.
I went most every afternoon after work to look at dogs. Especially, puppies. We never really determined I would be the one to choose the dog, but that’s how it happened. I happened in and found the dog of our choice. I really had no idea what this puppy would turn out like, but she was the most lively of the bunch and she had good markings. I grabbed the paper from the tags hanging on the pet’s cage and went to the car to call my mother-in-law. It would be necessary for her to adopt our puppy, as she was the one with the connections, and later I realized the money. We would be the one’s to adopt and care for this dog, but in name the dog would belong to her until we chipped her at the vet.
As usual, with my poor planning, when we came to the desk, I had no money in my wallet. No money. Once again my mother-in-law came to the rescue and found just enough in her wallet to make the deal happen. I think Millie cost us approximately $14.00 that day. I made a joke with the clerk, and asked if that included food for the pet. She thought I was serious. I had to promise I would feed Millie.
Thus Millie was adopted into our family. The first of, at the point in our lives, 3 of our adopted babies. She is our firstborn. Even Jack says so. It’s amazing how integral an animal can be in your life. She is often the basis of decisions that shape our vacations and always our daily routine. She has exercised us, and tempered us and loved us no matter what.
Millie has served as a sounding board for our lives decisions as well. She is the voiceless part of the too-numerous-to-count conversations my husband has had over the years. Where I am the alpha-dog to her pack, he is the companion. They have their secrets about me, but they know they wouldn’t last a day without me. For she knows that we ‘sisters’ brought her home to her pack, and we’ll be around long after the boy’s have gone to bed.
My life is infinitely richer by having Millie with us. She has probably stopped us from many a fight by her willingness to listen without answering back. She has exercised our physical bodies by demanding a daily exercise over and above 1 walk a day. And she has trained us in the art of love and care so necessary to parenting. Our commitment level to seemingly unreasonable needs was brought to bear by her existence in our lives.
So to Millie and all the other 1st borns out there who have trained their humans for life’s adventures, thank-you. Thank-you from the bottom of my alpha-dog heart, for raising my family, and continuing to do so through so many of our life’s adventures.
